I believe in fade

0000, is the last chance for you to call me....

I'm waiting and waiting and waiting......

2300, my phone didnt ring at all, and i couldnt stop calling you....

I wish it was not a voice mail, and is you taking with me on phone but not operator....

2345, i scare~ i really scare i and you will just end like this...

I message you but none of them reply...

2350, trying to contact you no matter what... 

Try to get your house number, but i failed....

2359, I give up on finding you...

But still staring at the phone.... Wish that my phone ring at this time and that is you...

But is not, it didnt ring at all

0000, i totally give up...I didnt cry, but just felt disappointed  why you dont call me...

I think we can still survive without each others~~

0001, I preparing to off my phone, as i spoke you will unable to call me after 12am....

Finally, it ringing~~ and it is you....

I never hesitate to pick up your call.... 

I tear non-stop.... I doest know is because of too happy or what~~

But i just couldnt stop tearing....

You told me you was on phone with Maybe,

and thanks DIGI limit every call for just 45minute...

Luckily Digi stop your line and you just realize i was keep finding and phone you...

You call me immediate when you saw the message i sent.

At that moment, i believe our fade have not end yet.

And this is our FADE!!!

Dont stop it~~~

我变坚强了！

发现了很奇怪的景象。

数天前，

我失去了两个姐妹，家人，好朋友。

而我却拥有了他。

数天后，

我得到了两个姐妹，家人，好朋友。

而我却失去了他。
或许我真的不可能同时拥有你们。

这是上天给我们大家的考验。

熬过了，

自然在一起。

无缘，

惟有分开。

意外的，我却没有为这次的分开流眼泪。

有缘份，自然会在一起。

没缘份，那我们就做朋友吧。

朝我的心脏开枪吧~

对不起，

暂时不想和你说话。

昨天的心情，

无法用言语表达。

彻底的发觉，

我原来还是一个人。

超级多的负面想法，

从昨晚全都冲出来了。

或许，

我真的不是你的最爱，

你和它谈恋爱吧。

再多的忙碌也应该有通电话。

再多的爱也会想办法和我联络。

至少有一封信息。

或许，我真的不是你的最爱。

不想你了，

想你是件很辛苦的事情。

说真的，

我没有了朋友，

我怕连你也失去。

就让这些痛，

彻底的让我心死吧。

朝我的心脏开枪吧。

或许是自己的问题，

导致这一切重复的发生。

我该检讨了！

My day

My day is full of activity.

Thanks to my beloved and precious friends accompany, with no stranger JingJing and Carmen.

I arrived on Wednesday, check out at kampar and drive back to KL.

Its already 4something when reach home. Take a short nap and went out dinner with dad and mum.

The next day- Thursday 

Went out with besties, JingJing, she is so boring about her sem break!

Keep finding people for outing, and im one of the 'victim'.

Pull me out by not giving me the chance of resting T.T 'pity'

We met at Midvalley which convenience us to take KTM ^.^

We didnt plan to do anything, but we had our lunch or we called it tea time at sushi king

=.=''' bored with sushi king, i have it 3times for that week T.T

But Sunway and Midvalley branch is nicer than others. 

After all, we watch 'Priest'. Nice movie, but abit short... It will have part two i think~~

Ohya~ before that, i watch 'SERU' in ipoh jusco with sister on tuesday night. ^.^

My first ever malay movie. Just found out thier trailer and advertisement is totally different with Chinese movie. For Malay movie, they will only have Malay trailer, but Chinese movie, they will have English, Chinese trailer. ^.^ FUN

Friday.

The very first date was given to JingJing and Carmen.

Suddenly, bf told me that he will join us for that day~~

So, we went to Berjaya Time Square for this time. 

And we have our movie 'Thor'.

Interesting story. Love the muscle man^.^

Saturday,

have the pure dating with only bf.

No other people, but just both of us.

Again, Midvalley is our chooice. *Like KL no more interesting place hang out??*

Actually there do have alot of places, but Midvalley more convenience. *got KTM and near that fella who dont know KL way*

No movie anymore, but singing k at red box....

Apply the membership card which cost RM50 T.T

Honestly, personally recommend Neway than Redbox or Green box~~

Atleast Neway easy to find *available in 1u(near my house) and Time Square* and their food/ buffet nicer ^.^

Total we spent.... T.T RM92++ costly~~~

Sunday,

having my pool training at cheras.

Im taking Diving course at advance level and rescue.

Will be having exam soon by tomorrow T.T *wish me luck*

Then the whole day, very very tired, cause very very long time didnt exercise... 

Monday, 

Accompany my dad to met his boss, but he drop me at The Mines for waiting.

And i do nothing cause i was down that day.

Just sat on MCD and think about somethings...

After his meeting was following to buy equipment for diving on redang trip * 18-22 may*

Buying all the stuff and have our lunch at Ampang yong tao fu ^.^ nice 1~~

Then he drop me at Time Square to wait for mum pick me up T.T

Pity me~ thats only 1pm and i have to wait another 5hour.

so.... movie again~~~

This time is 'Fast Furious 5'.

I didnt watch the previous 1, but this is not bad too. Like the scene of they rob the money and kill the person.

And also the scene of driving~~ Muscle man available in this movie too~~ seriously fall in love with muscle man and those handsome guy ~~~ <3 :P

That was my 1st time visit the 'Maxx' Cinema at floor 10. 

The big screen 1~ real big! couldnt manage to take picture T.T but i will remember i watch movie in this cinema before XD

Tuesday,

Follow Mum go to work.

Before that, we have our breakfast at KFC ^.^

Nice Cheessy egg bun! I like the most... Is just cheessyyyyyyyy~ 

Then went to 1u for buying swimming suit. 

Meet alot of friends there. 

PR coursemate, besties, and those secondary school friends.

I wouldnt wear nice, very ugly appearence... please forgive me~~

My sem break is full of activity. 

Non-stop since i back from kampar.

And i believe, it will have more and more....

The next which is start from tomorrow wednesday, i will be going to redang for test!

18-22may~~ Not available in KL

And the next appointment is untill next monday only~~

Who going to date me out? Or my target to bring out??

Just give me a call, if wanna meet me up~~ 

His birthday

Today was celebrating his birthday. Yup, is he! His birthday is not fall in this day but the others two were. But just specially advance celebrate for him. The only him. (actually the others two already celebrate in advance in last friday la, we not that kind of 'no heart' one la. We are FRIENDS^.^)

Well, the whole day i went to ipoh with darling and dear. Was planning to celebrate with him alone but was not a good idea. I think his mood is not that good since he fall in sick dont know since when. So when i gather all our friends at my house and i give him a call. (was planning to lie on him that i fall down from chair and ask help from him and the others hide inside my room. But scare he rush for me then the conversation as below)

Me: Helo, i reach home already lu~

Jye: Ooo...okok. (rushing to end the conversation)

Me: Where are you oh??

Jye: At home lo, watching tv. (open-ended question)

Me: Took your dinner??

Jye: En.

Me: With who then??? ( i pretending im nothing when he answering my call like this)

Jye: Carmen lo. (again, rush dont know for what)

Then i was wanted to off too, but the plan must be go on. So....

Me: Ahhhh...

Jye:..............what?

Me: Got cockroach at my bathroom, can you please help me take away it??

Jye: Waa! Go ipoh didnt see you call me, now got cockroach will automatic come and find me la?! 

Me: Please la, i very scare of it le. Please (begging)

Jye: Okok la... wait a minute. 

Me: Huh?? dont wait la, straight come to my house la, faster la, i very scare le....

Jye: waa... no need bath all that ah?? wait la, i have to prepare de ma~ (aggressive that time)

Me:..... then then ok la... faster ah!

Then i ask them to prepare so that they can fit into my toilet and surprise him. And friends are do what i request. After 10 minute, i scare he really go to bath so give him a call again to make sure he is on his way.

Me: hey, where are you oh??

Jye: on the way la...( again, beh song mood)

And finally he reach!!! All are get ready and i open my door for him. All the way, he remain silent.... And thats only show when he is angry me. (didnt communicate at all, while walk into my room.)

And that time he open my toilet door. They surprise him. He get shocked. And i only scare he will angry. But he is not. Luckily his not. If not, i dont know what to do next. 

Well, all the celebration we didnt talk much. (Friends, all the picture we took just now please do not upload to facebook and tag me. I mean it!)

For jye, happy birthday and happy valentines day. I will never scare cockroach again. I will settle myself more than just ask for your help. By the way, thanks for answering my call like that way. I will never forget the tone you talk to me like today. 

矛盾

我哭了，我的眼泪总是轻易得掉下来。

原因，不详。

或许我真的爱哭吧。还是我喝太多水？

原因，不详。

一个问题出现在我脑海里。。。

我真的那么爱他吗？

和他吵过很多次，可是我们还是走到今天。

每次吵完架后都很想放手，可是都不舍得。

惨了，我真的哭惨了。。。

我感觉很矛盾。

明明很想念他，可是却不敢打电话给他。

怕他嫌我烦。

（他不喜欢我问他在那里。）

明明很关心他，却不敢联络他。

怕他觉得我喽说。

（他总是说他会很小心。）

明明在生气，可是却不敢和他说。

怕他说我小气。

（他总说我喜欢看你笑的样子）

明明很想跟他分享我的喜悦，可是总是说不出口。

怕闷荒他。

（他总是不闻不问）

明明很想依赖他，可是总是自己躲在一旁哭。

怕他说我难缠。

（他总是说我爱哭鬼）

明明很不喜欢自己一个人，可是总是把自己锁在房间里。

好像怕了整个世界。

（可能这就是他所说的私人空间）

明明很想和他说话，可是我们总没话题。

我们不多话说。

明明很想让他关心，却不让他知道我的状况。

怕他担心，怕他多想。

明明有很多明明，可是我却把它们留给了自己。

我不知道我想怎样。

也不知道到底是怎样。

我只知道，我很矛盾。

请你告诉我，我该怎样做才不会让你觉得我是这样的霸道，这样的任性呢？？
我醉了。你可以当作我疯了。

Happy birthday *cheat 1*

I had arguement with him few days ago. Erm... Quite serious 1! But today, he bought my my favorite cakie ^^

Although is not my birthday today, but i still got a whole cake as dinner supper^^

Totally love cake till max. Fruit cake from Cake Inns

Happy birthday to me^^ Love cake till max

Thank you for the cake and is fruit cake

We

Here are some of our picture. Can you believe?? This is our first time take photo together.

So i did some editing make the picture look nicer, but seem it is not~ lol^^

Im glad that i have him, i will appreciate what i got now. Thanks Jye~ Really feel happy when together with you. My emoness have been reduce after i meet you. Thanks for your take care and forgiveness. Love you ya...

In my hostel using my phone~blek :P

Tell you something. I love You. But you are the second, the first is my father. Dont jealous ya~ XD

错过的缘分

在对的时间遇到对的人，

将是幸福的。

在对的时间遇到错的人，

悲伤从此开始。

在错的时间遇到对的人，

将会遗憾无比。

If i got another chance, i never want to let it happen. I wouldn't want to know more about it. I rather never meet you before. But i appreaciate our relationship. When i need you, you never be there for me. When he at my side, you suddenly appear again. I dont know what you want from me. But i'm sure, i got HIM. I will never give up with him, just like you never give up with her. I prefer our recent relationship, is better than we are nothing. I won't hate you and i know you too. I just can say you are my best and ever friends. Its too late, we both knew in the wrong timing...

the problem

Do you realise my post getting lesser and lesser?? Im not busy with the study, but my mood of blogging totally off. For me, blog is express our own feeling and thought, sometimes maybe discussing some issue with friends. And maybe is a place that know more about others recent activities and more.

I appreciate my friends that support my blog. They know me through this blog, because i will express mine feeling, thought at here. I will share my knowledge*even i dont really have*, study, happiness, sadness with all of you. But i never think of my blog will have a great impact towards some of the people.

Im glad that i have him. But we dont usually look like a couple *thats our way of love*. He know me well *as i know* but i totally dont know what he want. I told him everythings so sometimes he get hurt and me as well. Is really difficult to tell him certain things. Im poor in explaining, and lack of talking skill. *i know is really suck for a PR student* but i really stupid. I cant handle things well as well. I know he will be checking my blog all the time just to understand me more. Thats the reason my post getting lesser. Sometimes, i thought this is just my little world. But my word hurt him. I need to care about his feeling. We got arguement all the time *all the time we together* at last dont know how to settle.

Our heart getting far, i dont know how to face him after that day we confront. But he look like nothing happen before.* i hope i can forget all the sadness we had* I can feel it... He is the one make me tear non-stop. And he is the one make me laugh after the cry. Maybe im too concerntrate on his feeling, that make us in this kind of trouble. Everytimes i spoke, i wrote sure both of us will cry loundly and tear non-stop. Im trying to update my blog, but i dont know who i can speak with. Blog is one of the best place let me to express myself. And here is the one place he find myself. T.T

I know he will be reading this as well, but this is the last post with this kind of sadness.
Sorry, Jye... 

爱很简单

爱很简单吗？

这是你一直都在告诉我的。

爱本来就很简单，

两个人开开心心幸幸福福就好。

昨天，

你我都混乱了。

我们都哭了！

我以为，只要相爱就好了

我以为，我不去想很多问题就不会出现

我以为，我以为。。。

我一直的以为。。。

却换来我们现在的混乱！

你不清楚我要什么，

我也不清楚你要什么。

朋友的一句关心，

我们才发觉我们的爱不简单。

你问了我很多问题，

可是

我都没回答你。

反而跟你说了伤人的话。

我真的很对不起你，

我不该让你猜测我的心。

昨天的情景，

我无法忘记。

对不起，我爱你

520

The memorable day for me and him. We start our relationship in this semester. We know each other in year 2009 May intake. But we both are friends. I dont know what make me fall in love with him, and he also dont know why love me^^ Yes, we both stupid get together.

Honestly, im not serious in this relationship at the start. Becuase i know he is not my dream man. He is a bad guy for his first impression.  But at last i love him. Not because of his out looking, but his inner beauty. He treat his friends well. Treat me as well. When i got trouble, he will immediate appreate for me. When i cry, he is the one by my side *less crying infront of my DDF- Des and Min*. Maybe this is the reason make me fall in love with him.

He do much more care about me. He sacrifice and slowly make change but he dont realize. I know all he did, i really appreaciate him. I love him deeply. Im getting serious in this relationship. You are the one make me serious in a relationship. I love you~ 520

You Dare???

喜欢我可以，可是会很惨。你敢吗？因为。。。

1. 我会经常emo，不开心。
2. 我很爱哭，就算是一点点的小东西。
3. 情绪大起大落，这一秒可以很开心下一秒也可以很down。
4. 我会为了功课而时常忘了关心你。
5. 我很自私。
6. 我不开心时一定要在我身边。
7. 我烦的时候，不要打扰我。
8. 别人可以不懂我，可是你不可以不懂我。
9. 有时候我安静，是因为我想看着你。
10. 我不讲话是因为我怕说错话。
11. 我笑是因为我真的开心了。
12. 我经常会想家，所以你要听我诉苦。
13. 我很白痴，也很迟钝。所以跟我讲话要直言不然我听不懂。
14. 你说的话我会当场相信，可是事后我会想很多的可能或如果。
15. 我的顾虑很多。
16. 无为的话更多。
17. 我不轻易地说我爱你，当我说了，那我是认真的也要好好地珍惜。
18. 我们可以不见面，也可以不说话，不sms不msn。可是你要知道我一直在线等你想你。
19. 跟朋友出街时要想我。

对，我很霸道！！！所以，要是你不喜欢霸道的我那就不要打扰我的生活。。。^^

New pet^^

Introduce you guys my new petty^^

It name called jye, but i wondering to called him another name... *any suggestion?*

Please suggest me a name for him~^^

He from perak, langkap.

Currently study at UTAR year 1 semester3 in Pychology.

Nothing special, but unique*havent fully discover la*^^

Quite handsome*for his own opinion, for me he is handsome for some of the time only*

He funny

Imbalance=imba

Pro=professional

Kind

Good person

As he become my pet,

i will take care of him^^